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Given an infinite number of engineers and an infinite number of word processors

Why is it that most engineers write like baboons?

I haven't updated in a few days, in part because I've been mired in re-writes for a technical report being produced by a project in which I participate. It's been slow going. My colleagues write like baboons. Correcting the stylistic and grammatical errors of others has made me less inclined to create entries here.

To understand what I'm talking about, consider the following sort of problems that I ran into repeatedly while editing the technical report.

To get from your home to your vacation destination, take the following steps:
  1. You will get on the airplane.
  2. When we tried this, we took a taxi to your hotel.
  3. Spent your days relaxing by the pool.
You should drive to the airport. It is imperitive that you stop at an ATM on the way to the airport and withdraw a large sum of cash and say goodbye to your relatives. Bribes are useful at your destination, but they are an old fashioned country and cut off the hands of people who will bribe local officials. A knife you must always carry when in poorer parts of town because the fruit at the local markets is very fresh.
If you don't think that there's anything stylistically wrong with this passage, please go out, buy a copy of Strunk & White and hit yourself in the forehead with it until you are able to pass High School Senior English class.

I suppose I can't blame my colleagues too much. Not being schooled in the rigors of graduate-level paper writing as I am, they didn't have my grammarian Ph.D. advisor who left a sea of red ink on the first few papers I tried to submit for publication. Many of them also didn't learn English as a first language and given their druthers would rather write in another language.

This frustrates me at times. I'm getting a rep at work for being a good co-author on papers. This is not a bad thing, but, it means that I end up editing the writing of baboons more often than I would like. I can't claim that writing a Ph.D dissertation has turned me into the next Hemingway or Twain, but, I can claim to write text that enlightens readers more than it confuses them.

Next time you notice that the instructions for computers or other electronic gear is hard to read, remember that there's a reason for it. That's what I always try to do.

said drgeek on 2004-05-04 at 4:13 p.m.

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