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godmothering

Hey y'all! It's Britney Spears again shouting out to my fans anywhere! Thanks so much for all the love! I'm a Mom!!!! I can have a smmmmoooookkkkeeeee!!!! And because I got a C-section, I'm still gonna be all tight and toned "down there" when I'm having totally awesome sex with my gorgeous hubby K-Fed! Oh wait... will the scar show when I'm wearing my signature halter top and low riders? Hmmm... I'll have Felicia find the best specialist to fix that.

I'll bet you're wondering why I'm writing today. I need to find a Godmother for Sean Preston. He's so totally awesome!!! I'm a Mom!!! Yeah!!! I asked Madonna, or Miriam, or Madge... or whatever she's calling herself these days. She said no! Can you believe it??? Oh well, she's not gonna get asked to do a duet on the next album. I guess I'll still kiss her in public though... my hubby thinks that sort of stuff is h-o-t hot!

I've decided to ask Kim Cattrall and I wanted to share the little letter I'm sending her. I hope she says yes!

Dear Kim,

Girlfriend, you need to help me out here. Sean Preston needs a Godmother! Kevin and I are hoping you'll step up and do this for us. We think you'd be totally awesome at it! You were a great mom to me when we were filming Crossroads. Kevin thinks your sex book was HOT (we used the position on page 47 to conceive Sean Preston, we think... if that helps.)

Since Madonna turned us down, Kevin has been lobbying for us to ask Jenna Jameson... or maybe one of the strippers at this place just outside Vegas where he and his Frenso buddies went for the Bachelor Party. Then I reminded him of some of those sex positions you used on Sex In The City and he changed his tune, let me tell you!

If you could just let us know real soon... I'm afraid some of that pimp posse Kevin hangs with is going to tell the "evil tabloids" that we're asking Jenna Jameson.

Love you much, y'all!

Britney

I'm such an awesome writer! I'm a Mom!!!!! Yeah!!!! Well, I have to go and have my first Red Bull since New Years!

Peace y'all!

Britney

said drgeek on 2005-09-27 at 9:07 p.m.

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The Wayback Machine - To Infinity And Beyond

those first two estates - 2009-02-04 12:58 p.m.
nativity - 2009-02-03 9:28 p.m.
I am with Brahman - 2009-01-28 9:43 p.m.
angry - 2009-01-25 2:58 p.m.
i am - 2009-01-23 8:33 p.m.