In the white corner: Dr. Geek and Fiancee S., haggard soon-to-be married couple
In the red corner: Various family members who have now received "save the date" information
LET'S GET READY TO RUMMMMMMBBBBLLLLEEEE!!!!
Fiancee S. and I were given our first interesting diplomatic test last night regarding invitations to our wedding. It regards the invitation of children to our wedding. Basically, we aren't inviting everyone's children. The room holds 250 people; the two of us and 248 of our nearest, dearest, and ok-we-have-to-invite-them. Because this will be "My Big, Fat Irish Wedding", there are just too many adult aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends as it is. We can't fit (much less pay for) all the children into our reception area. That said, we are making some exceptions for very near and dear friends and family and children who are participating in the ceremony.
Now enter my second cousin D. Go back about 5 years, and D.'s daughter was a flower girl in my sister S.'s wedding. Go back about 25-30 years, and I was ring-bearer in D.'s wedding. My memory of it was it was an ugly 70's affair; I was in a tan tuxedo with chocolate colored velvet piping on the edges, a riffled white tuxedo shirt (almost like Austin Powers, but not quite), and a chocolate colored velvet clip-on bowtie. Go back another 15 years further, and D. was a flower girl in my mother's wedding. D. and I haven't been horribly close over the years, but, you can see that there is an association between our two branches of the family going back to my mother's generation.
I got a call from my mother last night about D. She got her "save the date" card that we sent out a few weeks ago. It seems that D., her husband, and her two children (aged 16 and 12) were leaving the Land of My Birth for Our Fair State for a vacation the day after my wedding. After getting the "save the date", she moved their air travel reservations to the day of our wedding. Only then did she realize that her children might not be invited. She then called my mother and reminded her of past associations, including the fact that I was in her wedding.
Fiancee S. and I are torn about what to do. On the one hand, there is room in the budget to add two children. There is also the fact that the number of my blood relations expected to attend our wedding is small. On the other hand, they will most likely be arriving by air in the middle of the day and will ONLY be attending our reception, NOT our wedding ceremony. We feel like a temporary detour to their vacation. We also feel that attending the reception but not the ceremony is WRONG. There are some valid reasons why D. and her family must travel on Saturday, but the whole thing feels awkward.
No decision yet, but, I'm sure we will figure out what to do very soon.
said drgeek
on 2004-02-17 at 7:30 a.m.
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