The Christmas season seems to be one of the harder times of the year to get through for Mrs. Geek and me during the last few years. I don't know why... I certainly don't mean or want it to be that way. Last year, I got told off by Mrs. Geek's Stepmother for eating to fast at the Christmas table on Christmas Day. The year before, I got a pretty strong dose of reality concerning my sister's marriage, with unsettling results. This year's Christmas drama arrived early, when we found out what other members of Mrs. Geek's family were planning for the holidays. It hit us all at once this week, like a boxing combination that left us seeing stars.
The first left jab came when we volunteered to have the annual family Secret Santa gift exchange at our house this year. We thought it would be a nice opportunity to have some of the immediate family over to see our new home. Planning that turned out to be a logistical nightmare -- everyone else seemed to busy one weekend or another between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Finally, Mrs. Geek's Stepmom said "Sorry it's been so hard, how about next year?" Fine. It's a disappointment, but understandable.
The next left jab came when we found out why one of the weekends was unavailable. It seems that Mrs. Geek's Aunt, Uncle, their children, and their grandchildren are converging at the house of Mrs. Geek's Dad and Stepmom for their annual holiday get together. Even though Mrs. Geek's Dad is hosting the event, we have not been invited. Fine. Mrs. Geek doesn't get to see as much of her cousins as she would like, but family politics can sometimes be a little weird.
The knockout right hook came just after this news hit. Mrs. Geek's Dad and Stepmom and the various Stepsiblings are having Christmas out of town at a Stepsister's house about four hours away. We were never asked what we were doing for Christmas, and it was somehow assumed that we would be traveling to the Land Of My Birth for the holidays. So, we were completely left out of the holiday planning conversation, much less coming anywhere near being asked if we would like to attend.
No, we're feeling pretty snubbed by the family right about now. I don't think any of this was intentional. It's just the way some of the personalities and family dynamics of the situation fell together. It does make me wonder how we are regarded by Mrs. Geek's Stepmom and her children. Our relationship has generally been a cordial one, and I know that "they" as a family are sometimes different from "we" as a family. But Mrs. Geek and I feel pretty much forgotten by them right now. It seems uncharacteristic of them to treat us so, which makes it all the more sad.
The worst of it is that we're spending Thanksgiving with pretty much all of the people mentioned in this entry. How do we act around them? Do we quietly try to find out if people know that this has happened? Would that sound like we're angling for an invitation? I don't know. I don't know.
All I do know is that frustration over this is balling up with work- and house- related issues to make me very grumpy. I need to let all of this go, if I am to enjoy the holidays at all. The glass is half full. Honest. Really. It will be fun. Right? Right???
said drgeek
on 2007-11-16 at 6:36 a.m.
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